Terrified of your own voice?


When you’re all alone and the world is still, what does your internal voice say?  Or are you are ever even alone with your thoughts?

Eliminating the anesthetizing or addicting actions and distractions that keep your thoughts from your own ears and your words stuffed into your body is paramount to happiness.  When you’re distracted with busyness or addicted to something that keeps you stuffing your truth, your voice, your dreams, back into your body, you’re merely surviving. 

Last month I wrote about how and why you may have adapted out of speaking your truth and put forth ways to begin releasing your voice from your body today.  The steps I listed may have all seemed like work, so here are some fun ways that will loosen the grip of fear and secrecy that any compulsion, obsession or habitual practice has had on your voice:

  • take singing lessons (The mere act of opening your throat chakra dislodges truth.)
  • enroll in self-defense training (This is especially liberating if the instruction has you use your voice as well as your body.  I write about the empowering aspects of taking BAMM, Bay Area Model Mugging, in my memoir.)
  • let people in your life know what you think in whatever way you can muster (I usually don’t advocate for communicating important personal information and feelings electronically, but it may be easier to do it this way initially, until you're strong enough to use the telephone or stand confidently in person.  Use e-mail because it's private, not a social networking site.)

As a young girl desperately wanting to fit in and be liked, I strangled my own voice in many ways.  This became a pattern repeated for decades and today I continue to be challenged by the thought of speaking truth, although I keep doing it anyway.  One of my favorite quotes is by Georgia O’Keefe, “I've been absolutely terrified every moment of my life - and I've never let it keep me from doing a single thing I wanted to do.”

Speaking your truth, voicing your opinions, and sharing your secrets requires courage and builds courage at the same time.  Leanring to express yourself with gentleness and compassion towards others is also evidence of true liberation and confidence.  Speaking truth in this way, without anger or malice, is real empowerment.  Belittling, blaming, and being anonymous with your voice is indicative of being fearful and full of cowardice. 

One of my favorite shows is Americas Got Talent.  I get caught up in the stories and the emotion.  I shed sweet tears for the many contestants’ dreams coming true.  Some of my tears are because my own dreams, after being stuffed so deeply inside myself for most of my adult life, have come true and continue to manifest daily.  It was a challenge and journey to overcome my own distractions and addictions that kept my dreams and voice hidden, even hidden from myself, but it was well worth it.  So, I ask you, “What is your dream?  Where is your voice?”  I also add, “If not now, when?”